Plain Speaking

Our northern friend
calls an arse an arse
regardless of who owns it.
No bum for mates
bottom for babies
behind for those with nothing
between waist and thighs
no derriere for aunts
posterior for those he really dislikes.
This is not for me; give me a man
unafraid of euphemisms,
who calls me his gorgeous darling
when I behave like a fishwife,
look like an unmade bed.

Marion Carmichael

Published in Envoi October 2006

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